Heart + Healing + Health
Heart + Healing + Health
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Clarity Over Clutter

Adesua Wellington African Literature Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie Communication Culture Ebuka Obi-Uchendu Natural Hair Nigeria

My people, happy new year! How’s your weekend going? The last time I wrote on here, I shared with you an intimate letter to my current self. That was in June 2020 👀

Baderinwa Badé Obasa | www.badeobasa.com | Aki and pawpaw memes

First of, moving at your own pace aka “dey your dey” aka “stay in your lane” aka “mind your business” is vital. I‘ve been working on being intentional about not putting myself in a position to be pressured by [iyalaya] anybody and that has been stress-free, even my skin can attest to that. Likewise, ensuring I mind my business and do not pressure anyone with expectations oh; as I am learning to take people’s actions at face value.

2020 was globally a year of loss in some form or the order for everyone. This meant I needed to figure out how to nurture peace (internally) in the midst of the chaos going on around. In 2020, I made a decision to be and put myself first. I did this through forgiving, caring for, loving on, exploring within and investing in myself. Most importantly, being firm with who and what I gave permission to influence my peace of mind. Shoutout to brother Rema for the reminder. I personally believe that the Peace of mind we all look for can + is found through the Creator of the universe. Regardless of times where I felt not “put together”, I have that assurance that as I put in work to do my part, He will hold everything that concerns me and mine together. Having little, personal and intimate conversations with God helps me figure out what is important/unimportant to my journey and where to focus my energy on. So, I strive to channel this amazing bundle of care/passion/empathy/love/hospitality [which I once felt were weaknesses] that I carry in reciprocated spaces to decrease feeling drained, hurt or frustrated lol. 2020 had its moments filled with rewarding and not-so-rewarding decisions I made but overall, it was my best year (yet) & i’m sooo grateful! I’m hopeful 2021 will be more healthy, daring, rewarding and memorable for you too, yes you sweetheart. 

Ebuka Obi-Uchendu; Chimamanda Ngozi-Adichie

It’s Friday night and I just got back from work. I had a calming shower companied with coconut + sandalwood scented candles because why not. Next, what to eat? There’s vegetable soup in the freezer so I’m thinking of making poundo yam. While boiling water for my poundo and warming up some vegetable soup, I cut up some lemons to add to my mix of pineapple & kiwi juice Eeeeooowww!

My poundo yam & vegetable soup are ready to be devoured. It’s time to balance and unwind from such a busy week. I finished watching Bridgeton & Spenser Confidential few days ago so I’m thinking of what movie to watch next. Oh that reminds me, let me catch up on watching the Blackbox interview with Ebuka feat Chimamanda Adichie on YouTube. I’ve been up-to-date with all blackbox interviews hosted by Ebuka and he is skilled at what he does. I love Falz so obviiii, his interview was hilarious. However in this episode, I’m really enjoying how insightful and relaxing this conversation is. Both of them laughing, connecting and at intervals, speaking Igbo with such finesse. Igbo Kwenu👀. Oh before I forget. Dear Blackbox, please increase the volume from your end because I can’t hear most times even if I increase my volume. I’ve to squint my eyes as though I hear with my eyes but I digress.

Few things I discovered about her. She created her name Chimamanda, wawu. She is a lover of visual arts and really does spend her time writing sha. Music is not really her initial go-to as a way to relax and that is okay. She prefers European movies over American movies. Did you know I can hear your thoughts. Well, even though you didn’t ask me, I’m going to share :p

Baderinwa Badé Obasa | www.Badeobasa.com ; maraji even though meme

2 things I admire about Chimamanda Ngozi-Adichie

  • Her natural hair: I have been contemplating dying my hair and getting a pixie cut again. Even my “twin”, Adesua Wellington feels the same way. Oh btw, she finally replied one of my numerous Instagram comments haha. Next mission is operation #AdesuaFollowBadé or at least get her to record a special (birthday) video for me. It’ll make happy. Thanks in advance 😭😂. As I was saying, seeing how beautiful her hair is, how she rocks her natural hair effortlessly and I’m thinking “do I just continue to put in the work for a healthy natural hair or be a badass babygahl and get a pixie cut?”. Whatever decision I make, I still have to put in work to maintain either sha. What do you suggest? 👀
  • Her firmness: She is indeed ambitious and a “student of life” who enjoys constantly learning. I love her unapologetic she is about her perspective, likes, dislikes or even interests. She doesn’t give anyone access to areas of her life unless she wants to and it must be at her own pace. She is very clear about what she wants. My friend once mentioned “she seems to dispute something before she accepts it”. At first I thought, why not just easily say if you accept something or not. I find she challenges you to think through concepts and ideologies and not just accept or agree with everything. There is a part where Ebuka simply apologizes to the viewers for not being a Star Wars person and she gently said “don’t be sorry. I think that’s the part of the world we live in now, where you have to apologize for having your own likes and dislikes” and that’s facts. I don’t subscribe to cancel culture but I believe we should hold people accountable for their actions. Even though growing up she said she didn’t feel her birth name Grace was her, she exudes Grace when she communicates which I admire. That ability to be able to communicate passionately, clearly and calmly yet so powerfully. I’m not the best at communicating as effectively as I want to but I am working on it. Definitely doing better lol

Chimamanda Ngozi-Adichie & Ebuka Obi-Uchendu

Moving forward, I want to be more daring in my personal investments, be clear-er about what I do/don’t tolerate and be a more graceful communicator. I’m looking forward to more diverse guests on the show. I enjoy watching interviews or documentaries where individuals share realistic, intimate and vulnerable parts of their growth journey.

That’s all folks.

See you in my next post. 

Till then, keep loving, learning, laughing ♡



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  • Ann on

    A refreshingly insightful piece that dares us to be ourselves 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Thank you for the endless smiles and laughter we are graced with and keep up this amazing work girl 😘

  • Starboy on

    Omg Bade you love sandalwood scented candles too?
    Superb piece 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽

  • Fl!p on

    Being conscious about one’s personal development and taking the steps to even better ourselves.

    I’m kinda shocked about the expose on Chimamanda Adichie, really she formed that name. Oh boy!

  • Ijay on

    Very nice read. Looking forward to more posts from you 😁❤️

  • Bukola on

    Badeeeeeee!! All I can say is God bless you 💕❤️❤️. I love love this piece so much. So real, intentional, humorous and learnt a lot actually. Always and forever my motto peace of mind 🔥💕❤️.



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